McCoy Quotes

The music scene in England is much smaller. It’s not interesting to us anymore. We’ve had better times in Europe, esp. in Germany. England is the last on the list.

The Nephilim represent my absolute truth, what I say or what I feel.

As far as I’m concerned, I am The Nephilim and all it stands for, and I feel I should use it, even though the others don’t approve.

We had to develop something because we were such an odd-looking bunch…. [we] basically covered [ourselves] in a load of shit, so we at least looked like we belonged together…. We didn’t really think about the flour that much. It just happened.

…but it was very hard to please myself. I mean, I’d never say anything rude about the Goths. They were fans. I remember even as far back as the first gigs in the early 80’s, the audience was all in black, just a sea of black. We were one of the first bands who had that kind of audience, whereas everyone dresses in black now. But it was getting a bit tiresome with FOTN. Our last album ‘Elizium’ I found quite tedious to play live. To perform it and get out on stage made me feel a bit cold, I’d be walking onstage and there’s nothing happening there.

Some angels were cast out of the heavens, and they came down to the earth, and they bred with the women on the earth, and produced like this supernatural race of giants, and the giants sort’ve roamed the earth for a while and they were supposedly wiped out during the flood, but there was a few survivors, but no one really, really knows what happened to them. I mean, no one knows enough about the Nephilim anyways, it’s just like a legend, so we took the name on because it’s quite a mysterious thing, and we added ‘Fields’ as in like ‘magnetic fields,’ drawn in towards the Nephilim rather [than] like in green pastures.

London has changed drastically. It’s very hard to find a true Londoner in London. I grew up in Brixton, and it doesn’t feel like home when I go there, let’s put it that way. I don’t belong anywhere anymore.

I wanted to make music that takes me when I close my eyes

We’ve decided to reform Fields of the Nephilim in its traditional way, with the original line-up, but we will still continue with our experimental projects under some kind of Nephilim title, which will be immediately happening with me and Tony. We’re doing a new Nephilim album, which will be followed by a Fields of the Nephilim album, and they will be quite different.

A lot of our fans used to get involved with the ritual of it all and they’d bring flour to the gigs in plastic bags to chuck up in the air when we came on stage. Well, some of them came back to the hotel after [a show] and a cleaner found one of these bags. She called the police and the next thing we knew we were being hauled out of bed in the middle of the night and marched off to the nick in handcuffs! They searched our tour bus and found 13 lbs. of what they thought was cocaine, but of course it turned out to be flour! They couldn’t work us out at all. They must have thought we were heavily into our baking!

I didn’t want the group to be really big. I liked the idea of being a culty act. Huge commercial success didn’t interest me at all and I had a fear that things were going that way… so I split the band up

It’s like shutting a door and saying, “You can’t go in there.” So all you want to do is wait until everyone’s back is turned and run in there and have a look.

Whole life’s a big bad dream, I think. I dream in the daytime.

The split-up was inevitable, and I can’t pretend it’s been amicable. It hasn’t. I just decided I couldn’t work with these people or the management. We’d done the complete cycle in what we were representing, and musically I felt it was time to change. The only way to progress, to try to develop, is to kill what was before, sacrifice it. Annihilate it, break it down. I’m now in the process of burning the fields so as to develop what I set out to do in the first place.

People think I’m slow to put stuff out, but I think there’s a reason to put stuff out when it’s meant to be. Not chucking any old shit out for the sake of it.

I don’t particularly like interviews, if I can avoid them- I will avoid them, the same with pictures. It’s just a personal thing.

Now is the time for me to let go and release some new Nephilim tracks which have been constrained to the studio for some time. Trying to concentrate the work and thoughts down to a simple single objective is always a difficult practice but that’s the nature of the beast. Easy to find the beginning but always hard trying to reach the end. I’ll always close the door behind me to begin but it then becomes hard to find my way out when spending so much time in the dark.

Here in England there is just real shit weather. I like to be there where it is bleak, misanthropic and cold

As far as we were concerned goth was architecture. We knew we were part of an alternative scene, but we certainly didn’t consider it goth

The Nephilim was something I’d known about since I was really young. If you’re familiar with the first book of the Bible, Genesis, you see the sons of God seduce some of the women on the earth and they produce a race of people known as the Nephilim. According to legend they taught man about war, astrology, and magic. I’m fascinated by the idea.

The state of mind and the perception you can get being on stage is amazing. The feeling between us and the audience is definitely like experiencing another level of consciousness. I’d say it has the potential for mass ritual, really. The audience doesn’t have to be aware of that – they can be there just for the music.

I don’t like religion because it relies on other people – you shouldn’t need to rely on others for knowledge. I think the only thing you need to believe is in yourself. I think people are weak if they need something to worship.

As far as plans go, I never want to make any plans for my life, keeping to schedules. Obviously in reality, you have to do it to a certain extent, but this whole business we’re involved with is art to me. It’s making a nice piece of art. People expect you to turn on and turn off and fit into schedules and it’s a load of bollocks.

I find most of my inspiration and ideas, feelings and thoughts are very close to death. It’s just that I have more fascination for death than I have for life. I have more respect for it. It’s the only time you’re free. I just feel like we’re all prisoners of life, I really do

I’d be happy to be the person that said, “Right. We all die,” And then everybody dies. And I die. I’d be well happy. That’d please me. Man’s made too many mistakes and the majority don’t deserve to be alive because they’ve fucked it up so much for everybody else. So I’d like to see them pay the price, and I’d be happy to go with them.

Sometimes life hits you full speed

 I love extreme situations of weather – storm, cold and rain. When all the other people are happy to have a roof above their head, you will find me somewhere outside

The real me is the person you can see on the microphone during the shows

I’m a very isolated person

I live in a way that is disconnected from the outside world.

The Order [24th Moment] is something which existed during a long period, it is a kind of memory on the way in which we see The Nephilim. I do not know yet how The Order will develop. I have some ideas, but they are not developed enough yet. It is more of an engagement over time, a way of life, and it is not really a question of a “movement.” It is a part of me. I do not know why, or when, only under the threat of the whip. I know the whip